Charles Bukowski – Dostoïevski

dos au mur, le peloton d’exécution prêt à faire feu.
puis ils ont lui ont accordé un sursis.
et s’ils avaient abattu Dostoïevski ?
avant qu’il ait écrit tout cela ?
peut-être que cela n’importait pas
plus que ça.
il y a des milliards de gens qui ne l’ont
jamais lu et ne le liront jamais.
mais quand j’étais jeune je sais qu’il
m’a aidé à supporter les usines,
les putes,
m’a aidé à traverser la nuit
et m’a remis
dans le droit chemin.
même lorsque j’étais au bar
à boire avec les autres
épaves,
j’étais heureux qu’ils aient accordé à Dostoïevski
un sursis,
ça m’en a donné un,
ça m’a permis de regarder en face
ces visages rances
faisant partie de mon monde,
la mort me pointant du doigt,
j’ai tenu bon,
ivrogne immaculé
partageant l’obscurité puante avec
mes frères.

*

Dostoevsky

against the wall, the firing squad ready.
then he got a reprieve.
suppose they had shot Dostoevsky?
before he wrote all that?
I suppose it wouldn’t have
mattered
not directly.
there are billions of people who have
never read him and never
will.
but as a young man I know that he
got me through the factories,
past the whores,
lifted me high through the night
and put me down
in a better
place.
even while in the bar
drinking with the other
derelicts,
I was glad they gave Dostoevsky a
reprieve,
it gave me one,
allowed me to look directly at those
rancid faces
in my world,
death pointing its finger,
I held fast,
an immaculate drunk
sharing the stinking dark with
my
brothers.

***

Charles Bukowski (1920-1994) – Traduit de l’américain par Stéphane Chabrières

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~ par schabrieres sur janvier 19, 2012.

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